You have wormed your way into my life and my heart. However, I feel the time has come to address some issues with you.
1. It is my bed, I allow you to sleep on it. It’s not the other way around - quit growling at me!
2. Leave my stuff alone! You have destroyed countless shoes and purses. Not to mention every article of underwear I owned.
3. Items in bathroom trashcans are there for a reason! Trust me when I say that our guests really don’t want to see that stuff!
4. That is your reflection in the mirror! And why do you only notice it at 3am?
5. Sometimes I get to sleep in. That means I wake you when it’s time to get up, not the other way around! Keep that tongue of yours in check & away from my face!
On the other hand, you are the only one who will willingly eat anything I cook, even going back for seconds. And you are there by my side when I’m under the weather…….screw it - lets go for a walk!

