How do you deal with a nasty co-worker?
08/01/2011
As I’ve mentioned before, I love my job. I was so excited to get back to work today after being off for 3 days! I work with a great bunch of people, with one huge exception.
When I first started work, us 4 gals were a very close bunch, the office was full of laughter and playful banter, we enjoyed our daily gatherings, and would have lunch together as often as possible. We shared stories, discussing life, love, family, likes, dislikes, etc.
Mr Marine and I were still in our very early stage, and unsure of what was to become of us due to him being in Alaska and me being in North Carolina so I shared that with the group. Another had recently relocated to take this job, and her husband remained behind to finish up his last year of employment before retiring. As we got to know her, she shared more of her life, telling us of her “outside marriage activities” - something I’m sure she wishes she’d never told us but it’s too late to take it back now.
The suddenly she changed – a complete 180, with no rhyme or reason to her actions. She’s suddenly rude, stand offish, unapproachable….and that’s on a good day! At first I seemed to be her main target, but she wasn’t long aiming for another girl in my office. We tiptoe around her, waiting for the next eruption. It seems that she truly believes she’s the greatest thing ever, that the office will collapse without her,when in fact she’s nothing more than a glorified bookkeeper whose job I could do (and have done!!) without any trouble, or attitude!
How do you handle someone so unpredictable? Do you step up and get in her face, believing she’s nothing more than a bully who can dish it out but can’t take it? Do you sit back & not let the bullshit get to you, hoping that she’ll cross the wrong person some day who’ll quickly put her in her place? Do you bite your tongue day after day, until one day she pushes you too far and you snap, thereby coming off as the bad guy and possibly making her look like the victim rather than the villain??
In all fairness nobody should have to deal with an attitude or behaviour like that. In my opinion, it’s completely unacceptable. Given that she shared details of her life that probably should have remained unsaid, I cant help but wonder if her ‘entertainment’ has cast her aside. It says to me that shes not entirely happy with her life as it stands, but that isn’t any excuse for her to ‘abuse’ people as she is doing. Whatever her reasoning for it, she’s lashing out – and will most likely continue to do so until she’s called out on it and told civilly, and firmly to her face that such behaviour isn’t acceptable. Being the bully isn’t going to change her situation or remedy whatever the issue is – its more than likely a short term feel good factor for her being able to vent – albeit in the wrong situation and circumstances